Is there anything in your life you are avoiding? Any task, any obstacle, any phone call or chore or improvement? I often find that if something is daunting I just avoid it. Like my laundry room. Contrary to most mothers, I don't avoid DOING the laundry. I just avoid cleaning the laundry room. Maybe it has something to do with how small and crowded it is. Maybe it is because it has heavy, large appliances that aren't exactly easy to move around and clean under or behind. Maybe it is because it doubles as the pet room- the one they sleep, eat, and "use the box" in. Which makes it even more important to clean it regularly. But for me, it always just seems out of reach. I never want to take the time to clean it up, so I barrel through there, trying not to look at the fluff of fur that flits across the floor as I woosh past, pretending not to notice the dried drip of animal food on the sides of the dog bowl, completely avoiding the layer of dust forming atop and behind the washer and dryer. And don't even mention the fingerprint smudges around the doorknobs, those are pretty much omnipresent in our home.
Well, unfortunately it is all too easy to just avoid the tough things. Pain from past mistakes or hurts that haunts us, eating away at our happiness or our fullness of life. Chores that sit unfinished, unstarted even, that grow in size as they remain ignored. Phone calls that grow more necessary and will require more apolgies the longer they remain undialed. Wounds that grow deeper and break us apart more completely the longer they are left untreated. Sure, ignoring it now helps numb some of the pain, helps us forget some of the work that lies ahead- if only briefly. But the thing about avoidance is that the problem only grows as it is left untended. The dust gets thicker, the wound gets deeper, the stain gets tougher, and the pile grows taller. And eventually, if you want things to improve, you have to just jump in. You have to just push against the washer until it moves across the floor, get down on your knees, and start sweeping, vacuuming, and scrubbing out those dark places. You have to pour peroxide into the wound, cleaning out the debris and crust and caked on dirt before the hole will start to heal. And it's tough, you sweat, you bleed, you cry... but it is only then that true progress can be made- true healing can begin. It is only then that you can truly start to move beyond the initial problem, and towards the joy of completion.
Today I cleaned out my laundry room, and boy did it feel good. I can walk in there now and smell the fresh scent of Murphy's Oil Soap, feel smooth, clean floors beneath my feet, and run my hands over a dust-free, clean set of laundry appliances. And God spoke to my heart as I cleaned, and convicted me to stop avoiding the things that I don't like. He prompted me to truly start to examine my life for areas I've been dodging, and He challenged me to consciously start tackling the things that may hurt... for only then can I truly heal, grow, and smell the fresh aroma of progress.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Sunday, October 4, 2009
How deep is your hue?
I found myself pondering the other day... trust me- that can be a scary and unpredictable thing! So anyway, I saw a color swatch- you know what I mean, right? One of those slips you pick up from the paint store, 5 or 6 inches long with as many shades of the same color lined up along it's length. A sample of color, for you to bring home and check out in the lighting where you intend to apply it. Somehow in the twisted depths of my brain, that paint color swatch got me thinking about faith, specifically the depths of faith and growing closer to God. Don't ask, I probably couldn't even begin to figure out how the connection was initially made, but if you stay with me, you might see the connection... eventually.
You see, I was saved many, many years ago. I accepted Jesus as my lord and savior, and I asked him to forgive my sins and save my life. I know that on that day I was saved. I was no longer plain white "base" paint, I had color. The life saving, future changing color of salvation. I had chosen my hue (a nice blue if you like imagery) and I had asked for a squirt of dye. And nothing... nothing anywhere, anytime, can ever take that color away. Spread me as thin as you want, put me in whatever light you wish... I am no longer "white base" but am now "blue." Changed, forever. I'd like to say that from that day forward I was a perfect Christian, never sinning, always growing closer to God through study, prayer, and devotion, and always living exactly as Christ would have lived. Obviously: I wasn't. Honestly I just floated along as "saved" for a long time. Occasionally I'd make a step by doing a Bible study or signing up to serve in one area or another, sometimes I'd make a commitment and stay focused on keeping it- keeping myself in church and fellowship with other believers more regularly. But for the most part I didn't go far. I may have dreamed of a deep, rich, full blue... but in reality I was barely baby blue. A baby Christian for more years that should have been allowed, blessed with "Bible smarts" but not necessarily deeply connected to my God. Thanks to that wonderful and amazing God, I finally woke up. I realized that, although "saved," I wasn't living the way He designed. I wasn't growing the way He desired. I realized that my faith, my salvation, my character meant more to me than a decision in a land far away and a time long ago.
God put people, places, situations, books, studies, and time in my life in just the right way to open my eyes to the pitiful, pale shade of blue that I was letting my life stay. The more I realized how little I had grown the more I yearned to grow more. I disciplined myself for daily Bible reading and devotions, I started learning how to have a fuller prayer life, I tuned in to God's voice in my life, and I started exploring the gifts He gave me and figuring out how to best use them as He desires. And I feel so much deeper now. My heart is more in love with my God than it was the day I made that decision. I have prayed and studied and begged for God to deepen my faith, to grow my spirit, and He has been faithful. He has poured His word, His love, His mercy, His grace, and His wisdom into my life, as color in a paint can, and I am on my way to becoming the shade of blue that I love and desire to be. And what is likely the best part... is that He will never quit until the day of Christ Jesus. He will keep showing up as I seek Him, keep deepening my hue until the day comes when the earthly will pass away. And I will stand before His throne, and my truest desire is to hear the words, "well done." I hope that on that day I will stand, the deepest hue of beautiful blue that I've ever seen.
You see, I was saved many, many years ago. I accepted Jesus as my lord and savior, and I asked him to forgive my sins and save my life. I know that on that day I was saved. I was no longer plain white "base" paint, I had color. The life saving, future changing color of salvation. I had chosen my hue (a nice blue if you like imagery) and I had asked for a squirt of dye. And nothing... nothing anywhere, anytime, can ever take that color away. Spread me as thin as you want, put me in whatever light you wish... I am no longer "white base" but am now "blue." Changed, forever. I'd like to say that from that day forward I was a perfect Christian, never sinning, always growing closer to God through study, prayer, and devotion, and always living exactly as Christ would have lived. Obviously: I wasn't. Honestly I just floated along as "saved" for a long time. Occasionally I'd make a step by doing a Bible study or signing up to serve in one area or another, sometimes I'd make a commitment and stay focused on keeping it- keeping myself in church and fellowship with other believers more regularly. But for the most part I didn't go far. I may have dreamed of a deep, rich, full blue... but in reality I was barely baby blue. A baby Christian for more years that should have been allowed, blessed with "Bible smarts" but not necessarily deeply connected to my God. Thanks to that wonderful and amazing God, I finally woke up. I realized that, although "saved," I wasn't living the way He designed. I wasn't growing the way He desired. I realized that my faith, my salvation, my character meant more to me than a decision in a land far away and a time long ago.
God put people, places, situations, books, studies, and time in my life in just the right way to open my eyes to the pitiful, pale shade of blue that I was letting my life stay. The more I realized how little I had grown the more I yearned to grow more. I disciplined myself for daily Bible reading and devotions, I started learning how to have a fuller prayer life, I tuned in to God's voice in my life, and I started exploring the gifts He gave me and figuring out how to best use them as He desires. And I feel so much deeper now. My heart is more in love with my God than it was the day I made that decision. I have prayed and studied and begged for God to deepen my faith, to grow my spirit, and He has been faithful. He has poured His word, His love, His mercy, His grace, and His wisdom into my life, as color in a paint can, and I am on my way to becoming the shade of blue that I love and desire to be. And what is likely the best part... is that He will never quit until the day of Christ Jesus. He will keep showing up as I seek Him, keep deepening my hue until the day comes when the earthly will pass away. And I will stand before His throne, and my truest desire is to hear the words, "well done." I hope that on that day I will stand, the deepest hue of beautiful blue that I've ever seen.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Friendship
I was chatting with someone from work yesterday, and the question came up, "what is the friendship attraction between Y and Z." (Obviously, Y and Z stand for two other women we work with.) I couldn't really answer with much other than convenience and proximity. You see these two women are so very different it is hard to understand why they have a friendship such as they do. One is young, newly married, no children, college graduate currently enrolled in graduate studies, loyal, honest, humble... the other is different in almost every way. She's at least 10 years older, no college degree, two kids, married for quite some time, very self-important and self-focused, and will not hesitate to step on you if it saves her hide. Yet these two women are called "friends." It really got me thinking about friendship... the ones I have, the way each differs, and if my frienships are pleasing to God- following according to His design.
I realized that I have several different types of friends. Those who lift me up, those who keep me grounded, those who encourage me, and those I try to encourage. I know that God intended for us to live in community, in fellowship with others, helping each other and sharing burdens together. He wants us to be a loving people, a true community that brings his love to life every day for each other. And in many cases, my friendships do just that. Take A, for example, my dear sweet friend who I had coffee and cheese toast with yesterday. Whenever I get the chance to truly chat with her I realize how blessed I am to have her in my life. She encourages me and lifts my spirits in ways she probably doesn't even realize. We are alike in many ways, and she truly cares about my heart. And I truly care about hers, very much. I can only hope that our friendship of mutual support will continue to blossom in the years ahead. Or my friend B, who I've known for many years. We are different in more ways than we're alike, but we share similar "heart characteristics" if you will, and we've seen each other through many struggles, mistakes, triumphs, and failures. I know our friendship will last, as it has already weathered the tests of time, distance, and heartache. Then there are some co-workers that come to mind. There are a few who I have connected with intellectually that I feel don't have the spiritual connection that I'd love to see them develop. Some are more openly resistant to it than others, but because of our time together at work and our intellectual comraderie I still name them "friends." My desire for these women is to be a witness of Christ's love, so that at the very least a seed of "wow, something is different about her" is planted in their hearts. The danger in these friendships is that I will sacrifice my own high standards and participate in their gossip or less than Christ-like discussions. So far I've managed to realize the downward trend before it becomes an issue, but I realize that I have to be intensely aware of the tone of conversation. Lately I've also added a new group of friends, those who I've already known and appreciated, but I've only recently discovered that they share my faith. As I become more bold and willing to talk about my own beliefs I am learning who shares it and who shuns it. And I'm praying that God will help me grow closer to those who share it, and help me stay strong and bold about sharing it with those who don't yet.
So, my prayer is that I will continue to develop and sustain friendships that are pleasing to God. I know that His design includes sharing life with others, and I pray that I do that in a healthy, beneficial way that glorifies Him and His purpose.
I realized that I have several different types of friends. Those who lift me up, those who keep me grounded, those who encourage me, and those I try to encourage. I know that God intended for us to live in community, in fellowship with others, helping each other and sharing burdens together. He wants us to be a loving people, a true community that brings his love to life every day for each other. And in many cases, my friendships do just that. Take A, for example, my dear sweet friend who I had coffee and cheese toast with yesterday. Whenever I get the chance to truly chat with her I realize how blessed I am to have her in my life. She encourages me and lifts my spirits in ways she probably doesn't even realize. We are alike in many ways, and she truly cares about my heart. And I truly care about hers, very much. I can only hope that our friendship of mutual support will continue to blossom in the years ahead. Or my friend B, who I've known for many years. We are different in more ways than we're alike, but we share similar "heart characteristics" if you will, and we've seen each other through many struggles, mistakes, triumphs, and failures. I know our friendship will last, as it has already weathered the tests of time, distance, and heartache. Then there are some co-workers that come to mind. There are a few who I have connected with intellectually that I feel don't have the spiritual connection that I'd love to see them develop. Some are more openly resistant to it than others, but because of our time together at work and our intellectual comraderie I still name them "friends." My desire for these women is to be a witness of Christ's love, so that at the very least a seed of "wow, something is different about her" is planted in their hearts. The danger in these friendships is that I will sacrifice my own high standards and participate in their gossip or less than Christ-like discussions. So far I've managed to realize the downward trend before it becomes an issue, but I realize that I have to be intensely aware of the tone of conversation. Lately I've also added a new group of friends, those who I've already known and appreciated, but I've only recently discovered that they share my faith. As I become more bold and willing to talk about my own beliefs I am learning who shares it and who shuns it. And I'm praying that God will help me grow closer to those who share it, and help me stay strong and bold about sharing it with those who don't yet.
So, my prayer is that I will continue to develop and sustain friendships that are pleasing to God. I know that His design includes sharing life with others, and I pray that I do that in a healthy, beneficial way that glorifies Him and His purpose.
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