Letting go... and holding on

So, plans change, things shift, then something happens and they change again. It is funny how I've stopped stressing about the details so much and am learning to just go with the flow. Take this week, for instance. P had been planning to pick up a much needed dog crate from the southside, but got called away yesterday. Initially I planned to make the 1 hour trip down with the kids and get it myself, until the kind friend we're picking it up from offered for P to just reschedule for today. Great! So this morning I was planning to drop the kids at school, run a quick errand, have an hour or so to myself, then visit with my friend for an hour before heading back to pick the kids up. Change of plans #1 (for today) hit with a phone call from the kids' teacher telling me school had been closed because of weather. Okay. I can deal, the kids will just have to come with me to my girlfriend's house, and the errand can easily wait. Meanwhile, the phone rings again and it is P. He's gotten called away again and doesn't think he'll make it to pick up the crate. No problem. The kids and I have some free time before heading to my girlfriend's house, so we'll head down today. I rouse them up and am hurrying to get them warmly dressed and ready to hit the road, knowing the drive might take a bit longer because of weather, and am hoping to get this done a bit early before things get too scary out there. In the back of my mind I have a small feeling of hesitation, knowing it may not be the safest idea to hit the road with the rain/sleet falling and my two precious angels in the car, but poor puppy simply can not fit in his current abode another night. So I prepare to press on. I call my girlfriend and we plan to play it by ear, but possibly meet a little later than originally scheduled, but to include lunch together at her place. Until... yet another phone call. P reports (to my delight) that he may actually be able to make it after all. He's handled the call he had and is able to swing by and pick up the crate himself as originally planned. Phew. By now my plans have changed many times, but I'm still not at all stressed. What happened to me? Anyway, I get the kids back out of their jackets and into warm socks and snuggly clothes, and let them settle down with an activity to pass some time while I regroup. I glance outside and see something falling, something that looks suspiciously like snow but sounds and feels more like icy rain. Yeah, God knew we shouldn't be out driving an hour down and an hour back in this weather. And I still don't know whether or not we'll try to go visit with our friend, or if we'll call another friend in the neighborhood instead. (One in walking distance!) Either way, I'm learning to let go of my own plans, my own ideas and rigid schedules. I'm learning to let God work things out, to hold on to His hand, and to listen to His nudgings.

I still have so far to go but the desire is growing within me to draw closer to God. I know I need to. I know I want to. I'm just working out exactly how to. God has placed some ideas, resources, tools in my hands, and I'm on the verge of using them to the fullest potential. I pray that God helps me make the committment needed to really make it work.